AbsolutePickens (dot) com

Ok… well, the K5 runs…sort of.

It starts hard, and idles rough. If I hit the gas, it backfires a huge puff of smoke up through the carb.

I have a small, as-yet-unidentified wiring harness. I looked it up in my factory wiring manual (the same ones the folks used on the assembly line) and it only adds to the confusion. The closest thing to my engine in the book is a California-emissions V6, yet mine is a Tennessee V8!?!?

I’m thinking since the K5 was once a KPD (Knoxville Police Dept.) truck, that maybe Chevy sells all gov’t vehicles with California-approved emissions control equipment.

Either way, between the weird wiring harness, and the crazy-ass backfiring, I’m a little annoyed.

Yes, I am aware that this is my 2nd update in less than an hour. Deal with it. It’s been a while since I updated the Absolute Pickens online Newsletter, so I have much to annouce.

Houses:
I am moving a week from today. Yes… I got me a house in Grayson, GA. Actually, I’m moving BACK to a house in Grayson. My ex-roommate Tony got remarried, and in the process acquired 2 stepkids. To say the least, they are running out of room. Congrats to Tony on the nuptials, and the purchase of a new home in Woodstock, GA. He offered the house in Grayson to me for a good price, and with friendly payment terms. I could not turn it down.

On top of that, I know the area is low on crime–I did live there after all… The backyard is huge, and will give the dogs plenty of room to run around, and it’s already fenced in. Much work has been done on the house too… I’ll post pics once we’re moved in.

“And that’s all I have to say about that”…

Now for the guns… After my truck was broken into months ago, I decided to go ahead and arm myself. I had originally wanted a Uberti .45. Uberti makes some damn fine replicas of the old 1873 Colts (nicknamed “The Peacemaker”) that won the Wild West. As someone once said, “God made all Men, Samuel Colt made them equal.”

Well, as much as I love the look of those Ubertis, I realized something. Since they are replicas, they also replicate the one undesirable quality of that old Colt–the firing pin. The Colts could only safely be carefully loaded with 5, not 6, rounds, and the hammer had to be down on the empty chamber. The problem being that the gun could accidentally go off if dropped because the firing pin would rest directly on the back of the bullet. This issue with the Colts is so well known in fact, that competitive shooting organizations like the SASS (Single Action Shooting Society) require guns to be carried with only 5 rounds during events. This is true even for the modern guns, like the Rugers, although probably only for tradition’s sake in those cases.

Well, after reading some, I arrived at the conclusion that Ruger’s variation on the “Peacemaker” theme would be a much better purchase. Not only that, but cheaper. Ruger’s Blackhawk is a modernized version of the old Single Action revolver, but with a firing pin mounted to the frame–not the hammer–and which utilizes a transfer bar to keep the firing pin off a round while not being fired. This means carrying with all 6 chambers loaded is safe against accidental discharges.

As luck would have it, my friend Chuck Matthews was selling a nice Ruger Blackhawk, seen here. The price was right, so I picked it up on Valentines Day (2.14.2006). Since that time, I’ve become quite familiar with the gun, and put quite a few rounds through it. I like it, but decided I wanted something more traditional. Which leads us to…

My Ruger Vaquero… The Vaquero is built on the same super-sturdy frame as the Blackhawk, and utilizes the same safety features, except it has fixed sights, and in general is made to look like the old Colts. In other words, it’s literally the best of both worlds: Modern function, with old-world form.

See Ruger’s page on the Vaquero here.

After shopping for a few months online, and looking at all the variations of the Vaquero, I decided the “dream gun” would be a Vaquero, with a 4.75″ barrel, blued finish on the cylinder, barrel, and grip frame, and a case-hardened finish on the main frame. I fell in love with the less-common “Birdshead” grip frame. While it’s smaller than the standard grip frame (as seen on my Blackhawk) I still like it. That’s weird, considering the standard grips are somehow too small for my large hands.

In addition, I knew I wanted it in .357 Magnum. That’s due to the fact that it damn near impossible to find the .45 “Colt” (aka, Long Colt) ammo used by the Blackhawk. That, and the .45 Colt ammo you do find is for target practice, or competitive cowboy-action shooting. Not the best stuff for self-defense. It’s hard to find a “hot” .45 Colt load with a good hollow-point bullet. Not so with .357 Magnums!

To make it an even sweeter deal, I can shoot a cheaper .38 Special round in the gun. Actually, .38 Specials are around half the price of the .357s.

So there you have it. Visit the links to check out Ruger’s site, as well as my own pages on my Blackhawk and my Vaquero.

~jp

Wow… I must say, I never thought the sound of an engine starting would cause me so much happiness. Today, finally, after many months and several failed attempts, The Beast awoke.

The nearly catastrophic fire back on December 28th, 2005, destroyed most of the wiring harness under the hood of my truck. Thanks to Shades (Matt Levene) for the replacement wiring harness. I’d installed most of it months ago, but got stuck when I broke the bolt off in my tranny that holds the kickdown cable in place. Because I’m moving a week from today, it was imperative that I got the truck running this weekend. I have to have the tranny rebuilt, and hope to have it towed to the shop this coming Monday, the 22nd.

After replacing about everything in the distributor, it wouldn’t spark worth a damn. Connecting a screwdriver to a plug wire and holding it against ground gave very little spark. I received a used distributor in the mail that including some useful parts. I only ended up using the ignition module though. I installed it using a Chevy-approved modification to simplify things. It should result in an overall better-running truck.

Turns out, my attempts to get it running this past week were utterly futile, as I’d unfortunately left out a crucial part. There is a tiny wire that runs from the ignition coil (in the distributor) to a connector. Without getting technical, I’ll say that without it, the truck won’t run, and in the process, the ignition module will get fried. Well, I think it’s pretty safe to say that I fried 3 ignition modules.

So the wire was properly installed. I didn’t have that little wire, no idea where the original one went either. It came with my new ignition coil, which probably wasn’t needed The shitty part is, that new coil ($70) was unreturnable once the package was opened. Oh well, now I have a “performance” ignition coil, LOL.

So anyway, I crawled into the driver’s seat, as I had so many times in the last 2 weeks, and tried to start it up. Much to my surprised, it took a deep breath and shot out a huge plume of smoke from the tailpipe. It didn’t want to run, but I feathered the gas pedal until it was able to maintain an idle. I got out and adjusted the timing a bit to get it running a little better.

So I’ve cut it off, and I’m waiting on the engine, as well as the outside temperature to cool off some before I head out to clean up and secure the wiring under the hood.

Monday, (provided I get it running well enough) it’ll be towed to the tranny shop. They’ll drill out and re-tap the hole for the tranny kickdown cable, and while they have it open, change the speedo gear for the 3.73 gears I had installed when the rear end was rebuilt.

It’s been a long road, but I can finally see the end in sight.

Thanks to everyone for all the help in getting it up and running again.

~jp

Well yesterday me and Giliani went up to my storage unit and pulled out the spare windows I had in a box. A few years ago, a friend of mine who shall go unnamed, was being a jackass and busted out my passenger-side vent window. In his defense, the window was incredibly stiff to move. He exercised poor technique, and yanked the handle through the glass. It took 4 months to find a replacement for a “decent” (read that as “not outrageous”) price. What I eventually found was a complete set of door windows for my truck…all 4 of ‘em for around $30 or so. I used the one I needed and put the rest in storage. Glad I did that too…

The weather wasn’t great, but not terrible. It was warm enough for me not to wear a jacket, although rain was in the air. G did her part to help, and was nice enough to hold the door steady for me on numerous occasions while I wrestled the remnants of the old window out of the door and installed the new one. Given that I wasn’t sure how long the job would take or what all I’d have to remove in order to do it, I’d estimate that it took somewhere between 45 minutes and an hour. Not too bad…

While I was out there, and in the mood, I decided to take a crack at removing the burned wiring harness. Let me tell you, this was no fun. But I did it. Right now, I have the original harness stretched out on the back porch, with the donor harness laid next to it for comparison.

If you don’t recall, a good buddy named Matt up in Iowa donated the harness from an ‘85 Suburban that he’s parting out. It’s not an exact match, but very useable. Mainly when I say “useable” I mean that it has enough of the correct type of wires to remove and splice into my existing damaged harness. In fact I will end up making use of most of it. Thanks again Shades! (Matt)

While I was under the hood, I noticed that the transmission kickdown cable was also damaged in the fire. If you don’t know what this part does, just know that it’s important to have But it’s a cheap part, so no biggie. I just hope the install isn’t a bitch.

The only thing that upset me was having to pull the distributor out completely in order to get the harness out. In retrospect, I suppose this is a good thing, as the distributor got pretty nasty inside when the fire melted a hole in it. So a good cleaning is in order. I marked it as best I could to ensure that I reinstall it in the same position.

My biggest concern is hooking everything back up the way the factory did. No small task given my “slash and burn” method of removing the wiring. However, I did make several mental notes and I’m not TOO awfully worried.

To assist me in that task I’ve ordered a factory wiring manual complete with diagrams. It’s the book the folks used on the assembly line to put it together in the first place, so it should be fairly detailed.

As for today, it’s raining and cold…DAMNIT. I can only work on the truck as daylight and weather allows. Daylight means weekend work only. I get home from work around 5:45pm, and of course by that time it’s getting dark. And with 2 wet weekends in a row, this is really starting to piss me off.

So I’m making progress…slowly but surely.

~jp

…..

Ok… I was able to deal with the rear axle going out…it happens… The incident where it caught fire because of my own carelessness, sure…

But not this…

On Tuesday morning, my girlfriend left for work, then came back about 2 minutes later saying “You gotta get dressed and come outside…someone broke into the K5.”

I get outside, and the driver’s side window is no more. Pisses me off because the tailgate window was unlocked. They took a cheap Pep Boys ghetto speaker box, my Minidisc player, the amp… Worst of all–they took all my tools.

I had one of those big green military ammo cans with all my wrenches, sockets, and screwdrivers in there. Not now.

I mentioned to my girlfriend (a self-admitted city-fied girl) that I don’t feel safe living in Midtown (Buckhead) Atlanta. I’ve always lived in subdivisions and out in the country. Now I know that theft can and does happen anywhere…but this has never been a problem anywhere else I’ve ever lived. That morning she said that after this she wouldn’t mind moving somewhere less populated.

Personally…I’m going to put my computer-geek skills to good use. I plan to install a “silent” alarm. That is–an alarm that’ll alert me inside the apartment, and not make an audible noise from the truck.

And if any of those sons-a-bitches decides to jump the fence and into the property, and try that shit again, they may be staring down the barrel of a Uberti .45.

On a good note, I had planned on replacing all my hand tools with Craftsmans, or something of similar quality and with an equally good warranty. Last night we hit Sears and I walked out with a new 155pc tool set. It’s got all the wrenches, sockets, and screwdrivers that were stolen. Nice hard plastic carrying case too…

My, how things can turn around in 24 hours…

My beloved Army Field jacket will be repaired. It’s “sectional” enough to where the stitches can be removed, the burnt fabric taken out, and new fabric sewn in its place. My girlfriend has decided to take on this monumental task of resurrecting the jacket. Sweet!

In the meantime, she located another jacket online. Her first plan was to use it for parts. However I couldn’t possibly endorse the destruction of such a good specimen. It’d be like killing a man to use his heart for a transplant…it just ain’t right.

So she asks what size mine is… I look… turns out the one she found was the same jacket–and I mean the SAME one. Korean war (pre-Vietnam) era M-65 Field Jacket… OD Green, aluminum, NOT brass zippers, and even the same exact size. The best part, the price was only $19.00.

Now, it can never replace the original, and as I stated the original will be restored to working order. However, it’ll be nice to have a backup or “stand in” to wear without risking the original, which holds much sentimental value. Plus it’ll allow me to maintain my “style” if you wanna call it that. My “style”, admittingly, being quite strange and undefined…

Now…the truck… An online acquaintance from a Chevy 4×4 Truck forum has a 1985 Suburban that he’s parting out. It has the necessary parts to get my Blazer back up and going.

Aside from the time involved in replacing the wiring and distrbutor (and quadruple checking the fuel line this time) I really won’t be out too much money because of my idiocy.

All in all, things appear to be working out.

~jp

Yep…I did it… It’s one of those things you either read about or somebody tells you about. Either way, you realize how incredibly bone-headed it is and think to yourself that you could NEVER be such a moron…

Well, apparently I can be such a moron:

I finally was able to get to the only place in town I know of that regularly stocks Edelbrock metering jets and similar parts. I picked up the smaller jets to put into my carb to properly lean it out.

Yesterday I drove home from work, about 3 blocks. I routinely get harassed by my friends and coworkers for driving when I could walk such a short distance, but I enjoy driving, and being in the cold wind tends to cause ear aches. The distance is short enough to where the temperature gauge usually doesn’t hit the regular operating temperate by the time I get to work or home on a cold day. Yesterday was not so cold…

So I popped the hood, and the carb was plenty cool enough to work on. I went about disconnecting the links and fuel line, before pulling the airhorn off and getting to work on setting the floats back to their factory designated positions. I did that, then quickly swapped out the jets. Everything was going smoothly. I checked, double checked, and triple checked the float height–perfect. Gently snugged up the new jets, then replaced the airhorn, bolted it back together, and went about reattaching all the linkages.

There was one thing however, that I neglected to reconnect…a little thing called the fuel line.

I turned the key, and tried to crank it… Now in these situations, I don’t fasten a seat belt, because I won’t actually be going anywhere. This unfortunately causes that friggin’ buzzer to go off for like 10 seconds, drowning out any weird noises the engine may make. However, I did hear a noise. Sort of a pop/boom noise…the engine did not start though…

Hmm…

A pop…followed what at first appeared to be a puff of smoke. I then realized that this was no puff, rather, it was quickly becoming a plume of smoke.

Hmm…

It took about 3 seconds for me to realize that the engine was indeed engulfed in flames. I acted quickly–that is to say, I quickly ran around freaking out with absolutely no idea what to do. I live in a gated apartment community, and parking lot auto work is technically forbidden. I have no water hose. The only thing I was close to was the new Ford Excursion parked right next to me.

The firewall was ironically, on fire… and there was a burning puddle of gas under the tranny. I grabbed the first thing I saw–My pre-Vietnam war M-65 Army field jacket…Yep…over 40 years old, and made before they started using brass zippers…The one my late Father got when he entered the service back in the early 60’s.

I proceeded to beat at the flames to put them out to no avail. I did somehow realize that maybe I should first put out the burning puddle beneath the truck. I did so with the jacket. Then went about trying to stuff the jacket between the carb and firewall to put out the flames–no dice.

So I jumped in the truck and found a shitty little wind breaker. I tried supplementing the field jacket with the wind breaker–no dice.

Suddenly, a woman appeared out of nowhere and very calmly asked “Would you like some water?” Of course I’d like some damn water…

So she whips out a few half-empty bottles from her car. I pull the now burning jackets out of the engine bay which catches on and yanks out the tranny dipstick at the same time. I douse the area with all the water she has, the fires go out, except for a couple of burning vacuum lines, which I pulled off with pliers and stomped out on the ground.

I stood there for moment…breathing heavily..my lungs hurting from sucking in all the burning gas fumes and burning rubber and plastic smoke…the underside of the hood was still slightly glowing red…the white paint on top of the hood now appearing like a slightly toasted marshmallow…

As the smoke cleared, I assessed the damage. The distributor is, quite frankly, no more. At least, the non-metal parts. A few vacuum lines are gone. Wiring that was on the firewall is now exposed, burnt metal.

I looked at the mess and noticed that fuel line, ironically unscathed, lying there pointing toward the back of the engine and firewall. Apparently when I hit the switch to crank it, the fuel pump, doing its duty, shot gas all over the damn place, and onto hot engine components.

You may now take a moment, to laugh your asses off.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
While dousing the area with water, I think it’s possible that I dumped some into the tranny dipstick tube… This really has me concerned. Really…after all that, this is what concerns me.

You see, the wiring and vacuum lines can easily and cheaply be replaced. The distributor components can be just as quickly replaced, and if I’m thrifty very cheaply as well. I already have a spare ignition module, and have seen used HEIs on eBay for dirt.

I’ve done harder work than that, and I’m pretty good on the electrical end of things.

But the potential of water in the tranny REALLY has me concerned.

All this on the 2-year anniversary of my Dad’s death, like I needed for December 28th to suck even more. My girlfriend said that he was watching out for me and prevented it from being worse… This I don’t doubt, but I had to ask myself, if so, why didn’t he yell at me or something before I hit the switch.

Thanks a pantload Dad…I’m sure you’re laughing your ass off right now.

annoyed
~jp

Wow… way too long between updates… Yeah, I know. I haven’t been able to dedicate any time to my site in a good while. So here’s what happening in my neck of the woods:

After my K5 Blazer’s rear axle decided to take a proverbial dump, I knew I needed a replacement ASAP. After weighing my options for a good long time (months) I decided to have the existing axle rebuilt. Not until after I’d blown $160 for 2 used axles and a set of wheels and (good) used tires.

During this time I acquired a 1983 K10 Suburban via my good friend Richie Lemay. Lemay’s dad Rich Sr. sold me the truck after it had sat unused for a long time. It was retired as a truck his surveying crew used to carry gear with. It served me well, allowing me to go buy groceries, get to work, and took me to pick up the used axles and tires. It was such a piece of crap that he actually refused to take money until he was sure it actually made it all the way from TN to Atlanta.

The K5 was towed to the mechanic’s place on 11.4.2005, and work commenced after the holiday weekend. Wednesday the following week I somehow threw out my back, but was determined to get the used axles to the mechanic, as he said that he’d take them in on trade toward the work he was doing. I managed to fight traffic for almost 2 hours, and was there all of 5 minutes. Long enough for him to state that it was too late to unload them but he’d give me $150 for them. (remember, I paid $160 for the axles AND 5 tires and wheels!!!)

The next day my back was so screwed I could hardly walk. I called and he said the rear axle was in and working, but they found a problem on the front end…the driver’s side ball joints were shot. So I asked how much to fix them, and he gave an acceptable number. I gave the go-ahead and he said it’d be done by the time I got there.

Getting there proved to be quite an exercise. The bad back was making driving difficult. Then, the K10 Sub started to give up the ghost. I’m not kidding, she was sputtering, shuddering and shaking. Every hill was a long torturous exercise. At its worst, I was doing 30mph uphill on the interstate with my flashers going, driving in the emergency lane. And such a rough ride with a few hundred pounds of axles in the bed made it sound like I was flying a B-17 bomber through a sky filled with Nazi anti-aircraft flak–NOT FUN.

The plan was for me to drive the K10 back, with my girlfriend driving the newly fixed K5 behind me. This troubled me because, although I don’t consider her a bad driver, she’s never handled anything like the K5. On top of that, I wasn’t sure the K10 would even make it there, let alone all the way back. We went 33 miles like that and finally pulled into his driveway.

I shut ‘er off, and went inside to pay the man. The K5 was minutes away from coming down off the rack. I asked him if he knew anyone that may be interested in the K10. He asked what was wrong with it. I told him about the rusted-out body, the fact that the speedometer was the only working gauge, the rough-running engine, the slipping transmission… he asked how much, and I said $500. He didn’t seem too interested and didn’t know of anyone that would be either. I frankly didn’t blame him.

I went out to reposition the Sub to let him extract the axles. He came out right behind me and offered me $400 straight up for the Sub. I didn’t hesitate to look at my girlfriend and say “Babe, come get your stuff out of the Sub… we’re leaving it.”

So with that, he refunded $400 of my money and we headed off in the K5.

Now I wish this were the end of the story but, alas, it is not…

The K5 was obviously in bad need of a front-end alignment. I had to keep the steering wheel about 80 degrees to the right to maintain a straight line down the road. Knowing that I had to be at a wedding in Tennessee on Saturday afternoon, I woke up at 7am on Saturday morning to be first in line to have it done.

No go…The passenger side wheel bearings are shot. Bummer. No alignment, and driving was ill-advised, but I took it 4 hours up the interstate to TN and back in the same day.

So that’s where I remain. On top of all of this, the engine has never run correctly since I had it replaced last year. The carburetor has always run extremely rich (too much gas) and it doesn’t have anywhere near the power it should. It also was averaging 12mpg on the interstate–YES REALLY.

Yesterday, some troubleshooting on my part unearthed a vacuum problem. I partially solved it by changing a carburetor gasket that was leaking. I think I know the source of the rest of the leak. I have a new part coming in that will properly replace some Ghetto-engineering I performed last year when I put the carb on there.

This morning the engine was idling faster and had more power. I think I’m on the right track with the vacuum leak. And the front end will be fixed and aligned shortly after I get paid in 10 days.

Until then…

So, I have 2 glaring issues with my truck…

1) The carburetor is not working right. The carb is a year old, and was apparently defective or not set up right from the factory. It DUMPS gas into the engine, causing it run WAY rich and consequently use much more fuel that it’s supposed to.

This I can deal with.

2) The rear axle is dying quickly. What this means is, when it goes, I won’t be able to move and there’s the potential of it taking out other (very expensive) parts with it when it does die.

So I looked at the options:
a) replace the existing unit with another of the same — Hell no… it was weak from the factory.
b) repair the existing unit — I just talked to the dude at the 4×4 shop. He says all bad parts will be replaced, seals, bearings, gears, etc… plus labor will add up to $1000 !!!!! HELL NO
c) replace the existing axle with one from a 1-ton truck. This is by far the best option. That axle is known in 4×4 circles as being “nearly indestructable” to quote its many fans. After pricing it all out, it’s still gonna run around $1000, but I’ll be way better off. Besides its unreal strength, it’ll have disc brakes (I currently have drums ), it’ll have low enough gears to turn the 31″ tires I use as opposed to the current axle which won’t allow me to maintain 80mph on the interstate, and that unit comes with a warranty.

This option is best, however it’s a total pain in the ass. I have to buy the axle and ship it from Wisconsin to Atlanta ($500). The trucking company will take it as far as the airport and that’s it. I need 2 strong dudes to then help me move it to the shop. I was quoted $262.00 for the installation labor, $249.00 for the disc brake conversion kit, plus my existing rear wheels won’t fit it, and then I’ll need 2 new tires to fit the new wheels seeing as how they’ll be bigger wheels…

Decisions, decisions, decisions…

So I’ve decided to call the section highlighting my guitars “Weapons of Noise Pollution” in honor of the AC/DC song “Rock and Roll Ain’t Noise Pollution”.

It’ll be a place where you can see all my guitars and other assorted gear. You’ll quickly see how many of them are in “project” status–meaning either unplayable, or in a condition that makes me not want to play them.

It’s true that I’m rarely satisfied with any guitar in “stock” condition, so I’ll make sure to detail all the interesting little modifications that make them uniquely mine.

~later